I don't really know how to describe my feelings now. I'm so confused. After going through so much of life, i really wonder what i would if i could turn back time. Would i choose to try it or not? Had i gained life experience or had i just been silly? What exactly have i gained by trying it? Sometimes i feel some questions just don't have an answer to it. Or maybe i had gained something which i did not realise.

Well, everything is over la. I wouldn't ponder over it anymore. Its the past now and ill just let it go. I just want to apologise to darling because she gave up so many things for me. So many sleepless nights and so much time waiting for me. I'm sorry. I'm glad things are over and the urge of stupidity wouldn't come back to me anymore.

I know how much darling cares for me and how blessed i am to have her. Perhaps that's what i gained. Experience perhaps. Who knows.